May 13, Entry 42

The last journal for this year, dear readers!... Reader, I should say. I will sincerely laugh if anyone not in this school ever reads any of these entries. Today I'm going to talk about... Kirby! Kirby is a fat little pink ball who sucks up things and gains there abilities. He has a stomach as big as the universe itself! He has many games for all the Nintendo systems, but my favorite is Kirby and the Crystal Shards. I'm bored of Kirby now. Legend of Zelda! The Legend of Zelda series originally followed a hero named Link who had to rescue Princess Zelda from the evil forces in the kingdom of Hyrule. All the original games on the Game Boy followed Link, I'm pretty sure. The Nintendo 64 games, however, followed people who look exactly like Link, but aren't actually him. Next game! Sonic the Hedgehog! Sonic is a blue hedgehog who always has to foil the plans of the evil Dr. Eggman, who was called Dr. Robotnik in the tv series and in the first games. His original games had fairly flimsy storylines, and almost all of them consisted of Sonic getting through a 2D stage and fighting Dr. Robotnik in different forms at the end of each stage. The Gamecube games were my personal favorite, and they had 3D stages with actual storylines. The new Wii games are junk, though.

May 11, Entry 41

Today I'll talk about my ZOMBIE PLAN! Taylor, Morehead, Zach, Aaron and I have an insanely perfect plan for what would happen in the event of a zombie attack. We would collect all the guns and other weapons they have at their houses and their relatives houses (a surprisingly large amount), and board ourselves up at my house, out in the country. We would have a large supply of hunting rifles, a few shotguns, and I think we might be able to find an assault rifle, or something similar. We'd also have tons of ammo, and we could get more from some places if we could get into Cedar Rapids. My house has a really good deck that we could lock off and break the stairs leading onto it, then we could attempt to snipe any zombies that got through the forest or up the driveway, but I don't think that's very likely. Once we had a good fortress set up, we'd probably go into town and collect any food and all sources of electricity we could find, such as generators and a lot of gas. Eventually we might attempt to get into Cedar Rapids, but that seems pretty risky. Especially if every single person there had been zombified. Our strategy would probably differ a little depending on the type of zombies we were facing. If they were the slow, stupid zombies like the ones from Dawn of the Dead, I honestly don't think they would last long versus the world population. Unless they managed to quickly and quietly infect a huge amount of people, the uprising would probably be put down rather quickly. On the other hand, if they were the fast and vicious zombies like the ones from Left 4 Dead (a popular video game), I think we'd have a lot more trouble.

April 15, Entry 40

I do not like them, Sam I Am. I think monkeys will take over the world. Then I'll pretend to be a monkey.

Yeah, I'd die in the wilderness. No tv, no video games, no barbecue chips, no instant gratification of any kind! Screw that, I'd just kill myself. Laziness for the win!

I really just want this class to be over so I can go home and play Mass Effect. I re-downloaded it onto our new computer and it took a while to get it working, but I fixed it. Yay.

Pie vs. cake is the war to end all wars. I vote for cake.

Everybody in the world needs to watch Red Vs. Blue. All other comedy series pale in comparison. If it could kill things, it would take over the world.

I like watching Let's Plays. They feature full video of entire video games, plus sometimes-amusing commentary! Shameless advertising and I'm not even getting paid.

I'm glad telemarketers can't use recorded messages anymore, although it was a lot easier to hang up on a message than a person.

Bilge.

There's a Let's Player who sounds like that one guy on M.A.S.H. I forget the actor's name, but the Let's Player's name is Chip Cheezum.

April 13, 2010 Entry 39

*Cough*. Uh... Stuff.

So... Yorktown. Awesome. Eh, I can't think of anything. Randomness!

The white bile of the Yorkish terrier is all that seperates the fire from the sea. Nothing crosses the glow-in-the-dark leg that differentiates muffins from jazz! So you want to be a Northman Forman, eh? Well you're gonna hafta EARN it! Slevin! Bring me 9,000 Big Davies and kill the jester that brought me this sand!No ugly hitman can escape my yellow gaze! Only one toucan has ever thwarted me, and his wordmouth was the spew of a thousand kill-henrys. That old hippopotamus was only seven things: orange. He is the bane of my non-existance! Only the great cake vs. pie civil war will overtake his shininess. Now is the times for tines! the giant race car cannot defeat my glow-berry in a contest of tallness! The rite of passage is to KICK THIS BLOB! Kick it! Kick it into next Gransnuary! Today is a good day to teleport! So, if we were to pull out today, and the Blues came and took our base, they'd have two bases in the middle of a boxed canyon. Whoop-de-frikkin-doo.

September 30, 2010 Entry 36

Anarchy! According to Mr. Swanson, anarchy is quite close to happening. Apparently a bunch of countries have enough EMP to knock out the whole country's electricity and fry all the computers. This would probably lead to anarchy considering almost everything is recorded or even controlled by electric systems. All the refrigerated food would go bad. No one would have electricity for anything even if they had a generator. Actually, I guess that depends on if the EMP was continuous or only for a little bit like it usually is. This probably isn't really a good way to start an anarchy now that I think about it, so I'll write about what would happen after anarchy has arrived.

Unless the anarchy's method of arrival was to kill most the world's people, people would probably be killed by others searching for food and water. Unless everyone was already dead, probably most people would be killed by others. I've always liked thinking about what anarchy would be like. I think the electricity would run out pretty quickly, and it's always funny how in video games and movies about the end of the world, places almost always somehow still have power. The only situation I can think of where we'd still have power for a while, is if most the people died suddenly. Electricity would no longer be being used by most households, and it would focus on the live people using it.

March 16, Entry 37

TIRE! Population: Tire! Ah, more Homestar Runner references. I recently began watching those again, and I had almost 30 new ones to watch! They update every Monday and I hadn't checked it for around a year. Although recently they were working on a game for the Wii so they didn't have as many updates. The game was called Strong Bad's Cool Game for Attractive People, or SBCG4AP! It was a point-and-click adventure game coded by the company that made Sam and Max and written by the Brothers Chaps, the creators of Homestar Runner. I on;y played the first two installments, but they were pretty fun. I think I might buy the other three.

Variety Show! a lot of people thought it went too long, and they were probably right. It went about 2 and a half hours. That was mostly because of transitions and poorly placed costume changes. We also didn't even write the sketches until a week before the performance, and there was much confusion. Other than that, though, it was really good. Everybody performed well and the audience generally liked it. It was fun being in the Airheads and playing my piano song. '

Other thing! Um... Stuff. Did you know that in Japan you can buy little girl's used underwear in vending machines off the street? Plus, high schools run auctions where the girls auction off their underwear and the proceeds go to the school. Japan is a pretty perverted place.

Something else to write about! The world will definitely end with an all-out war between the ninja-zombies riding dinosaurs and the robot-pirates. Their fierce battle will almost certainly end with the extinction of the human race and all animals and plants. Eventually there will be only one left standing, but will it be zombie, or robot? "Neither," says this well-informed individual, "It shall be the all-powerful, omniscient, Mr. Rogers!"

March 11, 2010 Entry 35

CRAZINESS! My half-brother flew in from Virginia yesterday! He's pretty cool. We talked about ROMs and things. Apparently there's a way to get a certain card thing that you can use in a Nintendo DS that you can download games, movies, music, all sorts of stuff. Then you can watch those and everything on the DS whenever you want. It's completely illegal, but Danny, my brother, made a good argument: if someone already made this technology and it's so much better than the DS is now, why not let him license it so they can actually make money off of it? Anyways, My mom is being hypersensitive about things recently. My dad and her heard a radio report on NPR or something about how letting kids play video games where you kill people has a psychological effect on them equivalent to "physically abusing them". This, of course, is utterly ridiculous. If it was true 80% of the boys and probably 30-40% of the girls in America would be psychologically wounded, or have aggression problems. My mom got all overprotective after she heard it though, and now she wants me to get rid of all my games where you kill ANYTHING, EVER. I think various sources including my dad and Danny have managed to mostly talk her out of it, but she's still acting overprotective and whatnot. It's partially my fault for being lazy and letting my grades slip down during the start of the quarter, but I had a talk with Mr. Mac and I would've fixed that on my own.

March 9, Entry 34

This is the amazing secret! The answer to the Ultimate Question! The Ultimate Question to Life, the Universe, and EVERYTHING!!!!!!!!!

42.

That's right, 42. Ah, Douglas Adams. He, sadly, is dead. In other news, another secret I figured out in Mac's class today: He played a game with us where he would have one person sit at a desk with different items on it. He would then turn his back and the person sitting at the desk would pick up one of the items for 9 seconds. They would then put the item back down and would be able to mess with the remaining items order, position, stuff like that. Then he'd turn around and sniff each object, in turn. He would then guess which object the person picked up with 100% accuracy. I was utterly dumbfounded at first. Then when Tom Alatalo was moving the items, he did it very secretly, and Andrew White asked me which one he picked up. At first I thought he was just curious, but then he repeated back my answer even louder, which made me think he was just saying it loudly before Mac looked at anything. This was partially correct.

March 4, 2010 Entry 34

yo yo ma! No delete key today. Meh I wonder what wonderful typos ill make today. I think I'll write about ... some kinda robot. What kinda robot? SOME kinda robot. Ah, I do enjoy Homestar Runner. Maybe I'kk attempt to explaain the Homestar Runner univers.e. The sort of main character who's almpst become a not main... character is Homestar Runner. He was the basis for the site, but a secondary character name Strinng Bad (Strong Bad! Grah.) Has become almost more popular than Homestar. Homestar is a strange -looking albino thing with no arms and soleds taped to the bottom of his feet, even though he deons't wear shoes. He has a speech impediment wihch prevents him from saying his Rs, and sometime s his Ls. He is really stupid, but quite athletic. Strong Bad is the oldenst member of the Strong family, which inclueds him, D Stron g Sad, Strong Mad, and thier pet, Da Cheat (Yes the "Da" is a part of his name). Holy cow my definition in Urban Dictionary is bad . Way to o bad to put on here. no. But one of my definitions is something greater than Chuck Norris, which is cool. More Homestar! Strong Bad is a generally all-around mean person who always wears no t-shirt, a boxing mask, and boxing golves, and black pants. He answers e-mails with funny videos every monday. Da Cheat, is a small yellow with black spots rodent-looking thing. He helps Strong Bad with his capers. Strang Mad is a huge square mountain who can't talk worth anything and is extremely stupid. He is best friends with the Cheat.

March 2, 2010 Entry 33

This is the blog that neeeveeer eeeeeeends. It just goes oon aaand ooon myyy friiiieeeends. Some people, started writin' it not knowin' what it waaaaas, and they'll just keep on writin' it forever just because this is the ah screw it. Something! What else... um... Blrg

Heavy Rain! Heavy Rain is an insanely awesome adventure/drama video game which my father described as "like watching a tv show without the commercials". I shall now attempt to describe the basic plot from the beginning, which will be extremely hard, as it really is as complicated as a tv show. A big selling point of the game was how the choices you make affect the ending. It starts out with a man who's name you don't know yet waking up in an extremely huge and awesome house. He gets up and looks at a note on the floor, which informs you that his name is Ethan and that his wife, Grace, went out to do some shopping for their son's birthday and will be back with the kids after lunch. Ethan takes a shower, gets dressed and goes downstairs. He then goes to work on a plan for a house, which, through inferring, should inform you that he is a successful architect. When he is finished, his wife and kids come home and he goes to play with the kids after helping his wife set the table. After you play with the kids, everyone comes in so they can eat before the older son, Jason's, friends show up for his party. When Ethan enters the kitchen, the younger son, Shaun, isn't there. Ethan goes upstairs and finds Shaun crying over his dead bird, and Ethan comforts him. It then cuts to a scene presumedly a few days later where the family is shopping in a mall with a lot of people. Grace and Shaun go inside a shoe store to buy Shaun some shoes, and Ethan and Jason go to buy a balloon from a clown near the escalators. While Ethan is paying, Jason wanders off and Grace comes back. Ethan goes after Jason and eventually finds him across a busy intersection. Jason starts running across the intersection while a car is coming. Ethan jumps in front of the car and grabs Jason, but Jason dies and Ethan gets knocked out and goes into a coma.

February 25, Entry 32

Ehhhh.... Blah...... Myeh...... Feh..... Teh....... Euuuggghhhhlll........ Things. Writing things, and then the, the pie, with the monkey-head. Um, sterrence? da huuuuuuuuuuuuuudge. da huuudge. Is too fat for bored-time. Yay, slow moving randomness. Is this the, um... the um... jugger... naut? what? I is too lazy and bored for capstitilizations! This is, um, things. Now you all shall feel a taste of fury...! Bored-tiredness. This probably isn't very fun to read. Oh well. Toooooooooo baaaaaaaaad... yes. googly-eyes is like things that are, um, googly. And maybe eyes? something.

Nothing is good! all things is tired. I not am actually tired much that. just writing things boredlike. So many red lineys! so many things not is words! So much bad grammars! rauasdufassssgh!

February 11 Entry 31

I do believe I will write about... pie. Eh, probably no. Grah! I can't think of ideas for video games. If I could get a concept, I think I might actually be able to write something good, although usually these things are created by a team of writers. Ah! I need a concept, and possible gameplay. Is it free-roaming, level-based, chapter based? Are there clear missions or is it non-linear? I don't know! I need an idea before I can do this. Maybe I should talk to Taylor and Morehead. Heh, no one calls him Ryan. I find this funny, because his last name is silly enough to become his nickname. Gregarious. Why do I like that word? It means talkative. This is all of its significance to anything, and yet I say it often and randomly, when it doesn't make any sense in the context. Grr... IDEAS! I need a team for this. That reminds me of House. I like that show. It has goodness. That's like how Spanish-speaking people say that: It has goodness. Maybe I could make some kind of shooting game based in the slums of Mexico. That's a happy premise. All sorts of opportunities for pleasantness there. Grah! I just don't know. I'll try and talk with Taylor and MH after school. Hooray for abbreviations! I wish for pie. this is the food of the gods. Especially pumpkin. With whipped cream. No cherries, though. Cherries is bad. Yay for bad grammar! I suppose if we're a small game company, we might just get commissioned to make specific things, or something. I have no idea how this industry works.

February 4, Entry 29

Video game ideas! er... I think I need a spark before I can do this, and sparks are sort of random... Taylor and I were thinking of an idea in which when someone was born, they would be able to pick 10 things that they could do, and that would be all they could do their entire life, so that could be like some sort of short game... Pick ten things and see how your life plays out. Obviously you need breathing, eating, drinking, heart beat I suppose could be a freebie. Free thinking, Eventually dying, moving your muscles, herm. That gets really technical. Maybe not such a good idea. Grah! I can't think of anything. Skyler's really annoying.

Maybe some sort of super-hero game like inFAMOUS could work, but I wouldn't like to do anything that didn't make sense...

February 2, Entry 29

It's almost my birthday! Today was also Morehead's birthday. He's okay. He swears too much. Not that Taylor doesn't swear, but Morehead still swears too much. He's still sorta cool though. Zach is worse...

No more of this talk! I think I'll try and write a story. This is a story about... Dang it. I want to write a semi-serious story, but the first part of the post put me in a random mood... I'll write about... an anime? No. Grah! If I was a writer, I would call this writer's block. Maybe I'll try my hand at video game writing. I suppose I could design a story. Maybe if I get good at it that's the job I'll have at the Taylor's game company. I probably don't have time to start anything now, but I could brainstorm ideas... Too late.

January 28, Entry 27

Meh. There is a short but interesting history behind the word "meh". Apparently meh was first popularized by the Simpsons when Lisa suggested they do something boring in their free time and Bart said "meh". Herm. Well, actually I suppose that's all I know. Meh. Nobody likes Seinfeld! Why doesn't anybody like Seinfeld. I like Seinfeld. It's funny. Karma Kramer? Ha ha ha haha! See? Hilarious! How can anybody not like this piece of comedic heaven? They are fools and they are wrong. Alright, enough ranting. What else do I have to say... Let's talk about... um... Pillsbury Toaster Strudels! That is quite literally the first thing that popped into my head. Jiminy Christmas! The first Christmas. Grah! No Jesus! Atheism for the win! The end of the world as we know it. Douglas Adams! This is kinda fun. PIE! You are a monkey-bob. Gregarious. Who's gregarious? Barack Obama is VERY gregarious. Who's outspoken? Rush Limbaugh. I greatly dislike Rush Limbaugh. I should probably stop bringing politics into these posts... and test and worksheet answers. Bias all around! Not that MSNBC and NPR aren't biased, but Fox News is just... holy cow. Barack Obama's not an American citizen, ooOOOooooOOOOooOOOO! It's his fault America's in the state it's in! No blame rests on the fool administration of Bush, no sir!

January 26, Entry 26

I WANNA BE THE GUY! No. No horribly annoying platformers. Today I shall be talking of the something. ooo! Leetspeak. 1337speak. 13375P3AK ANN0Y5 M3. 17'5 HARD 2 R3AD BCU5 7H3 L3773R5 AR3 R3PLAC3D W17H NUMB3R5. 17'5 K1NDA FUN 2 7YP3 1N 7H0. BU7 17'5 AL50 HARD. CAP17AL L3773R5! 7HA7 15 Y TH15 P057 15 50 5H0R7. 17 7AK35 A WH1L3 70 7YP3 7H1NG5. W0000! n00b. LOL! OMG!! ROFL! LMAO! No more. I is done with this, it bores me.

January 21, Entry 21

If I was the last person on earth, what I would do would depend on two things. One: Did everybody just suddenly die and now there are corpses everywhere or did everybody vanish? Two: IS electricity still there? I suppose I could always go to all the houses I could find and turn off all the electrical stuff, or just use a generator, I imagine there'd be plenty of gas left in the gas stations since nobody would be using it. The first thing I'd probably do would be freak out for a few hours or possibly days. Once I came to terms with what was happening I'd probably make a decision between killing myself or attempting to survive until either I found more people or the vanished people returned. Assuming I decided to live on, I'd probably drive into Central City in my mom or dad's car and turn off all the electrical stuff in every house. Then I'd look for any generator's I could find and attempt to get them into the car, which, I suppose would be the van now that I think about it. Then, if there was still room in the van, I'd go to the grocery store and pick up as much food as I could find. Then I'd probably bring it all home and make another run into town to get as much gas as I could from the gas stations before lack of power prevented the gas pumps from working. Then I'd drive to Cedar Rapids to get more gas and possibly some conversion cables from Best Buy so I could convert the power from the generator to power the appliances that you can't directly plug in, or try and figure out a way to connect the generator to the main power thingie.

January 19, Entry 24

Today I speak from the mouth of Crapface, ghost-cow extraordinaire! "MoooOOOOooooOOOOooOOOOOOOoooo!" No, wait. I forgot. All he says is ghost-moo. No! Away withst thou! What other magically magical creatures might I find in my mystical bag of mystical mystics? Aha! Hurlock, resident creepy, rotting-skin man! what say you? "HRAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHGH!" Goodness! What a filthy mouth! I daresay we don't accept that kind of humor in this household! Back to the bag! Gracious me! Yes, well then. What now... Aha! I've got it! mystical bag of mystical mystics, what say you? "I'm a bag filled with a ghost-cow, a rotted-skin man, a zombie, a ghoul and who knows what else. Just leave me alone."

January 12, Entry 23

Fire and brimstone! Meh, no randomness today. I don't particularly know what to write about though, maybe I'll just write another "whatever the heck pops into my head" post. Herm... No. I think I'll attempt to explain the plot of the book I finished reading a while ago. Okay then: There is a guy named... ah... dang. Ah! Soltan Gris. he works as an officer for a branch of the Voltarian government called the Apparatus, whose ranks are made up mostly of military school dropouts and people in line of execution who the Apparatus thinks might be useful. They deal mostly in taking what they want. I'm not entirely sure what they were established for, but the Voltarian government stupidly believes that all their dealings are perfectly legal, or if they don't, they just can't prove otherwise.