January 28, Entry 27

Meh. There is a short but interesting history behind the word "meh". Apparently meh was first popularized by the Simpsons when Lisa suggested they do something boring in their free time and Bart said "meh". Herm. Well, actually I suppose that's all I know. Meh. Nobody likes Seinfeld! Why doesn't anybody like Seinfeld. I like Seinfeld. It's funny. Karma Kramer? Ha ha ha haha! See? Hilarious! How can anybody not like this piece of comedic heaven? They are fools and they are wrong. Alright, enough ranting. What else do I have to say... Let's talk about... um... Pillsbury Toaster Strudels! That is quite literally the first thing that popped into my head. Jiminy Christmas! The first Christmas. Grah! No Jesus! Atheism for the win! The end of the world as we know it. Douglas Adams! This is kinda fun. PIE! You are a monkey-bob. Gregarious. Who's gregarious? Barack Obama is VERY gregarious. Who's outspoken? Rush Limbaugh. I greatly dislike Rush Limbaugh. I should probably stop bringing politics into these posts... and test and worksheet answers. Bias all around! Not that MSNBC and NPR aren't biased, but Fox News is just... holy cow. Barack Obama's not an American citizen, ooOOOooooOOOOooOOOO! It's his fault America's in the state it's in! No blame rests on the fool administration of Bush, no sir!

January 26, Entry 26

I WANNA BE THE GUY! No. No horribly annoying platformers. Today I shall be talking of the something. ooo! Leetspeak. 1337speak. 13375P3AK ANN0Y5 M3. 17'5 HARD 2 R3AD BCU5 7H3 L3773R5 AR3 R3PLAC3D W17H NUMB3R5. 17'5 K1NDA FUN 2 7YP3 1N 7H0. BU7 17'5 AL50 HARD. CAP17AL L3773R5! 7HA7 15 Y TH15 P057 15 50 5H0R7. 17 7AK35 A WH1L3 70 7YP3 7H1NG5. W0000! n00b. LOL! OMG!! ROFL! LMAO! No more. I is done with this, it bores me.

January 21, Entry 21

If I was the last person on earth, what I would do would depend on two things. One: Did everybody just suddenly die and now there are corpses everywhere or did everybody vanish? Two: IS electricity still there? I suppose I could always go to all the houses I could find and turn off all the electrical stuff, or just use a generator, I imagine there'd be plenty of gas left in the gas stations since nobody would be using it. The first thing I'd probably do would be freak out for a few hours or possibly days. Once I came to terms with what was happening I'd probably make a decision between killing myself or attempting to survive until either I found more people or the vanished people returned. Assuming I decided to live on, I'd probably drive into Central City in my mom or dad's car and turn off all the electrical stuff in every house. Then I'd look for any generator's I could find and attempt to get them into the car, which, I suppose would be the van now that I think about it. Then, if there was still room in the van, I'd go to the grocery store and pick up as much food as I could find. Then I'd probably bring it all home and make another run into town to get as much gas as I could from the gas stations before lack of power prevented the gas pumps from working. Then I'd drive to Cedar Rapids to get more gas and possibly some conversion cables from Best Buy so I could convert the power from the generator to power the appliances that you can't directly plug in, or try and figure out a way to connect the generator to the main power thingie.

January 19, Entry 24

Today I speak from the mouth of Crapface, ghost-cow extraordinaire! "MoooOOOOooooOOOOooOOOOOOOoooo!" No, wait. I forgot. All he says is ghost-moo. No! Away withst thou! What other magically magical creatures might I find in my mystical bag of mystical mystics? Aha! Hurlock, resident creepy, rotting-skin man! what say you? "HRAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHGH!" Goodness! What a filthy mouth! I daresay we don't accept that kind of humor in this household! Back to the bag! Gracious me! Yes, well then. What now... Aha! I've got it! mystical bag of mystical mystics, what say you? "I'm a bag filled with a ghost-cow, a rotted-skin man, a zombie, a ghoul and who knows what else. Just leave me alone."

January 12, Entry 23

Fire and brimstone! Meh, no randomness today. I don't particularly know what to write about though, maybe I'll just write another "whatever the heck pops into my head" post. Herm... No. I think I'll attempt to explain the plot of the book I finished reading a while ago. Okay then: There is a guy named... ah... dang. Ah! Soltan Gris. he works as an officer for a branch of the Voltarian government called the Apparatus, whose ranks are made up mostly of military school dropouts and people in line of execution who the Apparatus thinks might be useful. They deal mostly in taking what they want. I'm not entirely sure what they were established for, but the Voltarian government stupidly believes that all their dealings are perfectly legal, or if they don't, they just can't prove otherwise.

December 22 Entry 21

My perfect house most likely doesn't have an exact picture, because for the most part it's just a small house. The only defining feature of it would be the basement. The basement would have a very narrow staircase leading down to it and a door at the end of the staircase. It would also have no windows and a small bathroom through a door near the staircase. It would have thick carpeting and a lot of pillows everywhere. There would be a low ceiling and a desk with a gaming computer on one side, and a big-screen HD plasma tv with whatever system or systems I was currently using hooked up to on the other side. There would be a few beanbags near the tv and a comfy office chair in front of the computer. There would also be an amazing sound system connected to both the tv and computer On the last wall their would be a sofa and a big bookcase filled with any books I put in it. Other than the super-basement, the main house would only need the bare necessities for survival like a kitchen and bedroom. (although I'd probably often fall asleep in the basement on the couch). Herm. I can't think of anything that would make that house more awesome other than to have a pool or genie lamp or something. I actually saw the basement in a dream I had once and I've had that picture clearly in my head ever since. Of course, the house in the dream also featured an ornate indoor pool with golden railing and marble columns.

December 17, Entry 20

TIRE! Nope. No randomness. I think I'll actually try to be serious this time. Herm... what should I write about? I think I'll write about someone named... Servei! Eh. It'll have to do. What nationality is that? I think it's a real name... Ah well. Servei was walking to the park one day when a GIANT BEAVER CAME OUT AND CHEWED THROUGH HIS LEG BECAUSE HE THOUGHT IT WAS A TREE! OH MY GOD! AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! Yes it did. Then Servei went to the hospital and and he didn't die but now he doesn't have a leg. So then he went back to the park in his wheelchair and he TRIPPED ON A PEBBLE AND HIT HIS HEAD ON A PARK BENCH! AHHH!!!!! So then he went to the hospital and now he has amnesia. So then he went back to the park because he forgot about all the bad stuff that happened there and he FELL DOWN A POTHOLE AND BROKE HIS LOWER SPINE!!!!! WHAT?! ON NO HE DIH'NT! Yes he did. So then he went to the hospital and now he can't use his other leg. So then he went home and had some soup and tried to remember stuff about himself. Then he fell asleep and his face FELL INTO THE SOUP AND BURNED HIM! Wow, I must have a lot of pent-up hostility for some reason... Herm. Perhaps me doth make too many bad things happen to poor Servei. Alright! I've got it! Then Servei went to the gas station with his no legs and his amnesia and his scalded face and bought a lottery ticket. He won. Hooray for Servei.